So you wanna have a Gang Bang
Eva Sless
on 1 July 2020
32 comments
So you wanna have a gang-bang huh? Nice! Group sex, and being the centre of attention is a pretty common fantasy for many women, and being one of the participants of said activities is also a very common fantasy for men. Before you go rushing off out of the gates, however, there are quite a few things you need to sort out first, both mental and physical, and it’s a good idea to make sure you’ve thought of all of them before you indulge in the real thing.
Fantasy V Reality
In 2014 the University of Montreal did a study and found that over 28% of women had regular fantasies about sex with more than three men at the same time and Adult Match Maker’s “Under the Covers” survey found that 56% of Aussie women who were surveyed were turned on by the thought of group sex and orgies. And when Pornhub released their 2018 statistics gang bang porn was the sixth most popular category for women and women were 103% more likely to watch gang bang porn than men. So it is definitely something that women think about and fantasise about but, when it comes to actually doing the thing, how common is it?
The statistics are not easy to find on this subject, partly because trying to search anything connected to the word “gang bang” produces pages and pages of pornography before you get to any real kind of information, but also because while women’s fantasies are a hot topic of salacious fodder among websites and magazines etc, there is still a huge lack of interest or research done on the real side of things, and as we all know, for a lot of things, not even necessarily sexual, the fantasy of it is far better than the actual thing.
This (do I really want to do it or is it just a fantasy) is probably the biggest initial thing to think about, but is also probably the hardest to really know how you feel until the event actually happens so it’s important to keep that in mind when planning, leading up to, and during the activity, just in case it’s all a bit too much when it comes to it, and to know it is absolutely okay at any time to change your mind and decide not to go through with it.
Who, What, Where
The who, what, where parts of planning a gang bang are twofold and we’ll get to the rest of it soon, but probably the most important things you need to think about is who do you want at your party, what do you want them to do to you, and where you want it all to take place.
Who: Friends or Strangers
Both of these choices come with pros and cons and it’s vital to work out which one (or a combination of both) you’d like to play with. Playing with friends can have that comfort of familiarity about it, but can also, on the other side, have the awkwardness of familiarity that you may not have predicted. If they are regular play partners then that definitely makes a difference, but enjoying a gang bang with friends you’ve not had much to do with sexually before can create huge changes and upheavals to your friendship dynamics and really should be considered before attempting. Playing with strangers can give you that faceless, anonymous contact that many people desire when contemplating something as “out there” as an all-in gang bang, but then you really do need to think strongly about safety and security, and of course that connection and chemistry that is pretty important when it comes to sexual fun. When I say connection and chemistry I’m also talking about how all the players will get along with each other. While yes, the woman is the central figure in a gang bang, there is still the fact that a bunch of naked guys will be there too and it’s pretty important they all get along, communicate well, and have the maturity and respectfulness that is of utmost importance in a situation like this.
Another part of the “Who” question really needs to be “how many?” Do you want five guys or ten? Do you have ways to satisfy and accommodate the number you’re thinking of? Will there be times when one or two bodies may be left sort of hanging off to the side? What do they do while the others are playing? Will they be able to “get back into it” after a break?
What: Ground Rules
This is majorly important in all sex, and covers things like consent, boundaries, safe words, and everything else you and the attendees need to be aware of in order to make this a successful and enjoyable experience for everyone involved. Are you willing to have anal sex? Do you want to try double penetration? What is your safe sex policy? What about drugs and alcohol? Will toys or accessories be involved? Will you ask attendees for a sexual health certificate? How will you “police it” all? Making sure that everyone is aware of, and sticks to, these rules is absolutely vital in making your (and their) experience one of positivity and pleasure and safety.
Where: Home, Hotel, Club
The venue is also a really important thing to think about for a few different reasons. While you may feel far more comfortable around your own space, if you’re playing with people you don’t know very well, do you really want to invite them into it? What if the experience isn’t one you end up really enjoying? Could it then make your safe space feel different? What about your personal future security if one of the players ends up being a douche-bag or even worse? A hotel could be an option as it is neutral ground for everyone, but then you also have to think about the costs. Are you paying for the whole room? Will you ask the attendees to pitch in? Sometimes brothels and swingers venues will hire out rooms for these sorts of things which could work out to be a pretty good idea; a purpose-built area for sex will have all the things you need, big beds and showers and spas and possibly equipment like sex wings and beds with restraints etc, but again there is usually a cost involved, and a lot of people, yes even sex-positive people who indulge in group sex, find the idea of a sex club or a brothel a little off-putting for whatever reason.
Who, What, Where Part 2
The other bit of the “Who What Where” is a little more specific and also elaborates on some of the above points, while also answering some of the questions raised.
Who: How To Find Them
If you’re wanting to play with friends, it’s mostly a matter of mustering up your courage and asking them. If you’re part of a sexual lifestyle crowd (swingers, BDSMers etc) it’s probably a little less daunting, but remember, not everyone is into the idea, even those who seem kinky as fuck, so be prepared for, and okay with, rejection if you get it. Also be aware of the dynamics of who you are asking too. Will everyone get along? Will there be tension between other players for whatever reason? Be aware too that just because they say they’re into it, the reality (lots of naked men and penises around them) may make it tricky for them to be as into it as they want to be.
If you’d rather play with people you don’t know all that well, finding them on Adult Match Maker is probably the better way to go. You can put specific things like “group sex” into your search parameters which can help narrow down the field, and you can set up private chats and even video chats to see if you connect on a more personal level. There are even some Groups on Adult Match Maker who will help you arrange your gang bang fantasy.
Who: Security and Fluffers
So having worked out who you want to attend, you absolutely need to think about both your own personal safety and the safety of your guests. Sure, sex is supposed to be a fun and friendly affair, but we all know that’s unfortunately not always the reality, and when things go wrong in a situation like this, they can go really, REALLY wrong. So it’s important to have at least one person there who you know and trust, who won’t be joining in the actual activity, but can be in the room to monitor the whole thing. This does not mean someone gets to sit in the corner with their dick in their hand getting a free live sex show, it means someone who will be vigilant in watching your face and body language and listening out for your safe words or withdrawing of consent. It means someone who makes sure the men are behaving respectfully and who can handle whatever situation may arise if someone is asked to stop or leave or something like that. It means someone open minded and sex positive, but also tough and assertive. They don’t have to be a scary-looking biker dude standing over everyone making them feel intimidated (in fact it is probably far better if they aren’t), but they do need to have a bit of a “don’t fuck with her, or you’ll have to deal with me” presence. Some people may wish to be compensated for their “security” work, even if it’s a mate, and that’s something you may need to factor into your costs, but a small outlay in exchange for peace of mind and security is nothing, especially when you consider the alternative.
While “Fluffers” aren’t really a thing much any more, they do come up in certain conversations and articles about gang bangs and it seemed fitting to mention them here. A ‘fluffer” is a person whose job it is to keep penises hard in between activity. Often thought about in a porn film context, they are usually sexy girls who, while not part of the actual event of porn or gang bang are on the sidelines and can be called in to help when needed. In a gang bang situation they can be there to help guys get hard again after a period of inactivity or after they may have already ejaculated once but want to keep playing, or any other moment they may be needed. The hardest thing (no pun intended) about fluffers is that they will rarely want to do the job for free, and then it comes into a paid sexual service area which, depending on where you live, could be outside of the law, and regardless of that, could eat into a budget you don’t really want to spend… hence why they’re rarely utilised in this modern day world of group sex, orgies, and other sexual lifestyle activities.
(Note: The Security payment is slightly different, as they are not engaging in any sexual activities and therefore can be a loophole in the legalities, unlike a fluffer who is there specifically for sexual contact, even if only in a small way.)
What and Where: Activities
This is where you really need to think about, and elaborate on, the “what” from the first part. Is it just straight fucking and sucking and licking and stuff you’re interested in? Or do you want to include anything kinky like restraints or toys? If you’re insisting on safe sex, will you be providing the condoms? Are there any latex allergies in your group? If you’re planning on anal sex, be aware of bacterial transference from anal to vaginal areas, and make sure your security person is aware of it too and ready to be sure condoms are changed between activities and that no one decides he wants to bare back you without your consent by stealthing.
Sure you may love sucking cock, but do you want to be face-fucked til you gag? Having penetrative sex is probably a given, but what about DP? Or just anal in general? What about semen. Are you okay with it being around? And if so are you okay with bukkake, or are you a “neck-down, ew not in my hair” kind of person? While you don’t have to script the event – spontaneity and going-with-the-flow are great ingredients for good sex – it really is a good idea to have some sort of plan for what you would definitely like to do, what you might like to do, and what under no circumstances you are willing to do. Letting your attendees know these things beforehand (especially those hard limits of things that are off the table) is a great way to establish boundaries and preferred activities before anything even happens. It is also important for everyone to know that, even on the things you said you “definitely” want to do, you and anyone else attending has the right to say no and withdraw their consent, and stop whatever activity is taking place at any time.
Preparation Checklist
Condoms, lubricant, towels, a place to chill, a place to wash up, drinks, smoking area, snacks and other refreshments… These are all things you need to think about and have ready before you open the door and let the crowd in. What about mood lighting? Those electric candles are a far safer option than burning ones, or what about a pretty string of fairy lights to turn the place into an enchanting, sexy den of sin? Are you playing on your bed? On a mattress in the lounge? What pillows and cushions and blankets are you going to use? Do you want your favourite doona cover covered in the sex juices of six people? What about your own personal grooming? Do you shave or wax? What are you going to wear? What would you like the other participants to wear?
These are small, yet still important, things to think about and have in the back of your mind when planning your gang bang. In fact anything you can think of, even if you think it’s something super small and unimportant, is probably worth taking time to work out because, while it may never come up on the night, if it does, you’ll kick yourself for not being prepared.
The main thing to remember is to be safe, have fun, and always remember to have and get consent, and to listen and communicate with all the other players in the room.
Happy Gang Banging, my friends!
Tell us about your gang bang experiences in the comments!
We understand that this is a very cishet focused article and acknowledge that it is not the only way to play.
32 comments
rwp9966
More than a month agoIm in !!
ReplyI love it
Its so empowering to watch the pleasure women get in this kind of play.
They key is for it to be fun first !
Anyway if you want someone to join Im in !
Beachy0203
More than a month agoGreat article. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyMy gf is interested in exploring the gangbang scene, but doesn't want to be the "main act" yet. She wants to be the support act and be the fluffer or the girl that the guys pull out and cum on afterwards. This would give her a chance to experience the scene up close (with me beside her but not partaking) while not fully taking on the main role.
Is there any way to organise this? If so msg us.
kinky4somfun
More than a month agoTook my now wife to Brissy Bangers for her and my first gang bang , wasn't sure how it would go but we both had a great time. All the guys she played with were very considerate and I loved watching her get taken by multiple men. We talk about her doing it again quite often and are looking forward to when it finally happens.
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ReplyAMM.Events
More than a month agoSuzy used to run a great night. I believe she used to stand up front and read out the rules to everyone before the night got started. And it was definitely a players party. Everyone misses those parties in Brissy.
Funtimes8787
More than a month agoThere are lots of people on here not interested in the group setting. I am male, and very keen to join a group setting but I am alone looking for likeminded people. Message and/or like me if you are also interested in making this happen once mutually agreed thanks to this blog :)
ReplyClassyNights
More than a month agoEva, this is a great blog article - thanks! Really useful me as a cisgender heteroflexible guy. Planning a gangbang with/for a life partner is not something you want to get wrong!
ReplyWhosheretocum69
More than a month agoAny in melb love to go never able to get invites maybe cause my age
ReplyBaffler
More than a month agoI’m a Sydney based guy who is keen to be involved in one but wouldn’t know how? Any tips or takers?
Replygangbangrus
More than a month agoI have been organising private house parties for couples and single women and gangbangs for greedy women for 17 years as non commercial group.
ReplyPrivate house parties once a month and gangbangs on demands, each gangbangs cater for individuals needs and requirements, quality is over quantity, don't invite too many men and don't charge them $$$$ unlike some commercial parties charged, all men shared the cost of the venue, utmost respect given to women, never had one bad day, any couples or women would like to fulfil their fantasies or bucket lists, don't waste your time, get in touch with us, life is short, let's have some fun
cumslut47
More than a month agoi have organised quite a few groups of guys from AMM to gangbang me or just take turns fucking me , i find the whole experience to be amazing and it really turns me on, from the guys stripping off my clothes to all the guy’s coming on me and inside my nude body, i would highly recommend it and have plans for a lot more in the future.
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agoWill love to organise gangbang for you, you are welcome to Melbourne or will love to come to you, there are 2 regular women who comes to Melbourne for gangbangs
paddy138
More than a month agoHow about putting on articles on how guys are going to meet girls. After all that's what the site is here for.
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ReplyAMM.Editor
More than a month agoWe suggest you read some of the following articles, just use the search function:
The Sexual Science Behind Online Dating
Change your approach to women and ensure you're on the menu
Create a Profile that gets Attention
Meet More Women Online by Changing Your Approach
How to Get More Sex Using Adult Dating Sites
How to talk a woman into bed
Top 5 Ways Men Can Get More Sex
What Holds Women Back From Casual Sex?
Is your Online Dating Profile Guilty of These Turn Offs
AMM.Editor
More than a month agoJust as important as reading those articles is reading the comments from the women about how men approach them, what works and what doesn't. If you want to attract a woman, ask a woman.
Ngccple
More than a month agoYes have discussed a real gang bang,, so far have a had 3 guys including me fucking her, not sure if that constitutes a gang bang. Was pretty messy and fun so no complaints so far. I do like to make sure she is happy/looked after/satisfied and filled.
Replykbgc1234
More than a month agoI’ve organised a few gang bangs and have attended a few as well. The guys who attend these events are always considerate and respectful and really have the woman’s pleasure as their only focus. Guys who are uncomfortable with all the sausage around typically don’t stay. We’ve never had a problem with a woman’s safety or security – the experienced guys all look out for the woman and would quickly sort out anyone who’s out of line. After all, they’re only going to have fun if she’s having fun.
ReplyLaying out the rules and expectations in advance is essential but it’s also quite easy. Set your limits, say what you want, say what you DON’T, want and have fun. Don’t worry about having to please everyone, you can always call it quits. We always say there is no guarantee that the guys will get a turn; the lady always has the last call.
From an organiser point of view, the hardest thing is getting guys. You always have to over invite because a few just won’t show.
There are other opportunities as well; a few clubs/groups organise “greedy girls” days which may be better for an introduction to multiple men. At these no one is expected to do anything and no one will feel left out if they don’t get to play with you. A woman can also pick and choose who she plays with from the guys in attendance. The organisers usually set a ratio of 2 or 3 guys per girl so, if you’re after 4 or more, you might not get it though you will meet people who can help you get what you want.
Thickdong69
More than a month agoI have been a part of gang bang five times
Replywhynothaveago5
More than a month agoHad two, both organised by the same man who also organises swingers parties. He was brilliant in clarifying what I/we wanted and absolutely ensured my safety and comfort from beginning to end. The first was just me, the second with a girlfriend we played with, where we started the action and it was hands off until we asked them to join. Brilliant experiences.
ReplyMissMasBeach
More than a month agoI've run a few GBs for female friends.
Very importantly, they know me and trust me to run a good event, look after them throughout, and invite guys I know who are both respectful gentlemen and reliable performers in a group setting.
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agoI can definitely verify this having been to a few of there gangbangs and loved them all can't wait till the next one
Ifuwannadome
More than a month agobeen there done this, boring now
ReplyJayvon
More than a month agoGood article
ReplyI agree, Many guys say they're into being an attendee but get cold feet . Having your partner clearly lay out the rules before hand is also a way to go. GBs can be and are great fun. My advice would be, make sure you get to know AMM members online before inviting them to join the party.
Beachbunn
More than a month agoAlways been a fantasy yet to happen, unless you count 3 men as a gang?
Difficult part is finding all the men to be free at the same time.. Maybe one day.
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agoThe logistics are nearly impossible...
triXXXi66
More than a month agoPhew!!! Such a long list of things to consider... very interesting reading. Thanks Eva.
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agohave you been involved triXXXi66, if so how many and did you enjoy?
triXXXi66
More than a month agoNo i havent
mack866
More than a month agoim a guy and would love to be gangbanged by 7 to 10 guy never had one but want to try my luck
ReplyBIHORNY05
More than a month agoBeen involved in a few & plan to be involved in many more, I'm also good for security reasons & to make sure nothing gets out of hand.
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ReplytriXXXi66
More than a month agoBeing 6’6 and 115kg will sure make a woman feel safe it a GB scenario!
Fuckudeep129
More than a month agoyes indeed would love to be involved in a gangbang, never have but want to be so exciting
ReplySEQGangBang
More than a month agoIt’s an incredible thing to experience. As a wife to experience the thrill of ultimate surrender in a safe and secure environment with my husband close by as the things that made the transition easy.
ReplyAs a woman it is easy to please several men in one night, so this was a natural transition for us both.
With over 20 years of swinging, our experience is a well run event with carefully screened participants is the key.
Always look for verified profiles and ones with testimonials or validations from participants.
If you hold a good event you won’t have a problem getting validated.
Our gorgeous hot wives are happy to write a testimonial from any man or couple who walk the Mantra of their profile.