7 Things Mature Women are Sick of Hearing
Eva Sless
on 20 October 2019
102 comments
For some reason there is this idea that when a woman turns a certain age, say over 45, she is no longer useful, sexy, beautiful, or worthy. This is absolute bullshit and nothing more than sexism because the same isn’t being directed at men, and women are getting tired of it. Here’s 7 things to avoid saying to older women, no matter how well intentioned you think it might be.
You’re too old to wear that
Usually aimed at older women wearing tight or revealing clothing, this is a comment that shouldn’t pass your lips ever. To anyone. No matter their age or size. You are not the clothing police. You do not get to decide what people wear. This idea that feeling sexy or wearing clothing that enhances your body is only limited to the young, thin, and beautiful is bullshit. The thing is it’s not about you. Unless you are very specifically asked to comment on someone’s clothing, just don’t do it. A grown woman can wear what she damn well pleases and really doesn’t need your permission.
You should date people your own age
While many women do date within their own age bracket, many do not and really shouldn’t have to. While millions of grey-haired men date college students and interns to the high-fives and respect of their male friends, when a woman decides she would like to take a younger model out for a spin suddenly it’s all “disgusting” and “like fucking your Grandma”. No. It really isn’t. And if that’s how you feel… Here’s a hot tip… Don’t do it yourself! Problem solved.
But you look so good for your age
No. Stop it! This is what is known as a backhanded compliment and, while you may think she’ll swoon all over you for being nice to her, it’s actually not a compliment at all. It is incredibly rude to tell someone that they are okay in your eyes IN SPITE of something about them that they can’t control and that actually has no bearing on their personality, date-ability, worthiness, or anything. (See also: “You’re so pretty for a fat girl” and “I don’t usually like Asian chicks but you’re hot” or numerous other bullshit phrases like this) No. They look good. Period. There is no but.
You must miss the tight, perky body of your youth
Why? I mean yes, the world is obsessed with unrealistic body standards, and it always has been. So these women have already had the experience of a lifetime of body shaming, body guilt, being told they’re too fat, too thin, not tall enough, boobs too small, boobs too big, smile more, eat less, wear this, reveal this, don’t reveal that… You know what… By the time we hit our 40s and 50s we couldn’t give two fucking shits any more. Yes we want to be healthy and happy and feel great… But we’ve learnt that that is far more to do with what is inside than out. And anyway what’s to say we’re NOT still tight and perky under our clothes anyway. Make comments like that, and you’ll never find out.
Older women have lost their sex appeal
Speak for yourself! Just turn on the TV these days and marvel at the amazing strength, beauty, and sexiness of women like Gillian Anderson (50 years old), Salma Hayek (52 years old), Sigourney Weaver (69 years old), Jamie Lee Curtis (60 years old), Jane Fonda (81 years old)…. I could go on and on but I am sure you get the point... These are women who have survived in one of the most age critical industries on the planet and are still kicking arse and taking names, and are the subject of millions and millions of peoples sexual fantasies. Lost sex appeal? No. It’s about knowing exactly where it is and owning it.
I’d be too much man for you to handle (from a younger man)
This is where most women would laugh at you, say “alright, buddy” and move along. Firstly an older woman couldn’t give two shits about your ego. They’ve been there and done that with guys your age when they were that age and they’re not going to take it from you now. Secondly, yeah, okay Chad with the experience of one high school girlfriend and a hidden sock under your pillow, you totes have the upper hand there. Wow. What would this woman with more experience under her belt than years you’ve been alive do without you? The real fact is the opposite. A mature woman who knows herself, her body, her pleasure really doesn’t need your jack-rabbit lessons. While yes, it’s important to be confident in life, arrogance is just gross and no-one has time for that.
Don’t call me an “older women”
Yes, I know that’s ironic but it’s actually super important. Using the phrase “older women” has connotations of fragility and senility and is just not true. If anything women who have lived for over 40 years have an incredibly bright and switched on minds that have spent years and years filtering out the bullshit and forming itself into exactly what it should be. There is nothing fragile about a woman who knows herself.
102 comments
Lookingforsir
More than a month agoLet me add...
Stop calling me BABE!
Guys who continue to call me Babe after I’ve told them not to drive me nuts, and it tells me that they are going to be equally tone deaf to consent and other more important issues.
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ReplyKinkyGirl101
More than a month agoI find "dear" even more annoying!
Yesexx
More than a month agoYou know how to talk it up Eva, and you will enjoy the applauds given to you in the comments, but in the end, your article is lackadaisical. It is full of generalisations that do little to compliment the understandings of any young person wanting to understand the sexuality of a mature aged person, and I think that's a real pity. It reads like you have been personally offended and you seek revenge.
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ReplyAMM.Editor
More than a month agoThis article wasn't intended to "understand the sexuality of a mature aged person" it's part of a series on the blog which is a bit tongue in cheek and isn't designed to be a sex education piece. We've covered mature age sex in a number of other articles; Senior Sex! We’re still Sexy! We’re still Sexual!, Why Men Are Better After 50, 10 Reasons Why Young People Should Stop Freaking Out Over The Thought Of Old People Having Sex and At what age do you have the best sex of your life?
DeliciousEva
More than a month agoHaha.
Ummm... Okay
Have you missed this series?
It's literally "sick of hearing"... Which lends to the exasperated tone and general pissed off-ness of, yes... You got it, you clever thing... people not liking being stereotyped and generalised.
Like the editor mentioned, if you're actually interested there are literally heaps of blogs on here about what you've mistaken this one to be about.
Have a rad day, huh
Moruyamack
More than a month agolove this article
Replymy issue is I keep hearing I'm too young..that sucks
NeedSumLuvin7
More than a month agoBrilliant
Replyozmelbcpl4cpl
More than a month agoHate having to ask if the guys read our profile and when quizzed they appear to have missed lots of information that could have saved him.an email..
ReplyNext is im great at oral or massage which to me screams cant do sex.
Oh the list goes on.
Copy pasting exact same wording to our friends thinking girls dont talk ..heads up guys we do
Thata41
More than a month agoLove this article. In fact, I was reading a research that says that women’ market value actually increases with age. And I totally experience that.
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ReplyAMM.Editor
More than a month agoThat might have been based on the research study our members contributed to in conjunction with QUT
Helloyounglover
More than a month agoI like the experience and want ones of mature women They know exactly what they’re after azurekingfish
Reply68SimonIam
More than a month agoI love dating older ladies. They know who they are and what they want. Are much more fun in the bed room. And will tell you what they want.
Replysearchcougarsub
More than a month agoI've always dated much older women (before it was a thing), but I've never used those kinds of lines. I didn't know that stuff was said.
ReplyNice article and cute pic
jasras
More than a month agoThe women in the picture is looking super hot and sexy , i would have not said anything like that to anyone of her age if she looks like that. Rather would have been eager to spent the night with her.
ReplyDDdelite
More than a month agoSing it from the roof tops sisters!! We rock it, we work it effortlessly and we fucking love it!!
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ReplyThata41
More than a month agoPreach!!
eastman35
More than a month agodamn right
ReplyRobbie181
More than a month agoHumm I would not say any of those things anyway, thats what experience gives you. So I must ok.
Replyuninformed
More than a month agowomen who reach a certain maturity are shatteringly lovely.....sooo good
ReplyIwantfuntoo
More than a month agoLove women with experience.mmmmm
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ReplyCuddlyGirl22
More than a month agoThis is one that pisses me off
Darkstud
More than a month agoI have a liking for mature women and most of the women I have been with have been so. I have learnt a lot from them including their likes, dislikes and what turns them on. I could relate a lot to this article, thanks for reminiscing.
ReplySeafordTrans76
More than a month agoOMG EVA,Again you've written a "bang,on,crackin gr8 article/piece", I totally agree with you here, As Ive experienced a sentiment and similar commentary over recent years while I too gracefully add wisdom and a plethora of experience both good n bad to the 4 or so decades of my exhistance..Again I love to commend you on another wonderful and entertaining read,thats close to my heart and very well written.. Love from this huge fan of your work..xxoxx.
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ReplyDeliciousEva
More than a month agoThis comment made my day.
Thank you!
Have an awesome weekend xx
Account Closed
More than a month agoVery well said!!
8MillionAndOne
More than a month agoTo the author, sorry stoped reading at "college students and interns". In Australia we do not normally refer to higher education as college, uni, tafe or of late polytechnic course. As for intern, traineeship.
My guess is that this blog post is a copy paste from an American author
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ReplyAMM.Editor
More than a month agoFeel free to google that text, it's original content. If we've copied an article (with the author's permission) we add a reference at the top with the link to the original article. You'll find a few on the blog. But not in this case.
8MillionAndOne
More than a month agoGoogle may not show results form sites that do not pubish publicly and allow public search engines to index all their pages
I did read a bit further ??
what happened to all stunnig Aussie beauties born before the age of the internet? Are they not beautiful enough?
DeliciousEva
More than a month agoMate.
No-one fucken says polytechnic any more. It's not 1975.
Also I went to college. In Canberra. That's in Australia you know.
And an internship is actually a bit different to an apprenticeship or traineeship and also (like college girls v uni girls) doesn't have the same connotations that fit within the context of that particular paragraph (Monica Lewinsky anyone).
But hey, it's so awesome you took time out of your day to not read my article and then tell me about how you didn't read it and then accuse me and this site of plagiarism. I'm sure you feel like a super language slueth! Elementary n all that jazz!
:)
Account Closed
More than a month agoI didn't realise it was soap box time?! The peanut gallery might want to pop the ball gag back in.
CuddlyGirl22
More than a month agoOh - you must be one of those ‘young’ people that the article is about.
I went to college - and in the course of my day - I talk to INTERNS - not trainees. And what the hell is a techni-whatever ...
MiguelCDLOGAN
More than a month agoIf you're lucky enough to meet a woman confident in her sexuality, don't ever comment about her suitability for your tastes. You are in for a treat the likes of which only the lucky experience, Age? If that is a factor for you, yours or hers, then there's a huge chance you won't suit her tastes and you will have missed out on getting that much closer to sexual heaven.
That said, there are women that through circumstances and/or lack of opportunity, have not learned to let loose. Too many doubts, or lack of confidence.
Take your time, if you're able to wake up that bear... You're in for the ride of your life.
It's not just the sex... The physical part, but it's all about a woman that makes a man feel wanted as a man. And isn't that what we men want. When that comes wrapped in a woman that can bestow pleasure on you like nothing you've ever experienced., it'll be hard to hide the bounce in your step when you next walk in the office. Your air of superiority over mere males fumbling through relationships will be there for all to see...
Good luck when trying to take a dip in that most sublime of talent pools.
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agoThank you.
DreamingLovers
More than a month agoSo, so, so true... and taken from a journey of exploration, patience, and the perfection of practice... those who limit their upper age range are to be respected, of course, for their choices but they may just be missing out on an enriching and erotic experience beyond their constructed imagination... but, thankfully, many others include open age adventures in their delightful profiles and the journey continues most pleasurably!
ReplyRosieAnne
More than a month agoIf a guy said that to me it would be the first and last time he had the chance
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agoIt for the most part is just ignorance. I try to use it as a "teaching moment". Most apologise and thank me for educating them. A rare few choose to remain ignorant and they can go fuck themselves.
RosieAnne
More than a month agoGood I agree 100%
bushlinks
More than a month agoits all about quality
ReplyKeen4Playing
More than a month agoNothing like a bit of maturity and experience, great article, well said, just be yourself, enjoy every moment and guys like me will value and want to share every sexy moment you bring to the party, you’re amazing!!!
Replyronandbev
More than a month agoyes take from me i am married to beautifull woman who has sex written all her she is slim hot and waking up beside a beautifull naked body every morning in bed makes me feel how lucky i am and i show her she has a body they 30 year old girls would love to have and she knows how to use it she has boy friends to play with when she is feeling horny which is a couple of times a week she is the most pressious thing to me so i forgot to say she is 76 years young the old saying is use it or loose it
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agoyeh she is a very attractive lady like a great wine looks & taste better as she matures
FungaSafari
More than a month agoAn interesting article by Eva Sless. I guess it is written from a female perspective as Eva is a woman. I would be interested to find out what one says about mature men. Perhaps we should not distinguish between men and women on this. Then if we are looking at chronological age as a marker what does it tell us about a person’s physical and mental being? Looking at the profiles of many women in their ‘40s, ‘50s & ‘60s they still seem to have an upper age cut-off where they profess no interest in more mature men. Some of them like toy boys – best of luck to them. To each their own. Sometimes one sees a stipulation of some one having a job. I guess that is to weed-out the unemployed. However, there seems to be no thought on retirement. Retirees have more free time. Do not have the stress that a job entails. And most importantly the best sex lives of all. I can attest to that with an 80 year old woman.
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ReplyAMM.Editor
More than a month agoIt's been suggested that Eva research and write one from a man's perspective and I've added that to our list of future topics.
Account Closed
More than a month agoIn all honesty, and it's a poor generalisation, I know - just like saying "many older woman don't really like sex any more (blame menopause)" - but MANY older men (65 & up, if not younger) have erectile difficulties. Perhaps, instead of limiting age, one should stipulate (as I do) that all equipment should be in good working order! I much prefer penetration to other sorts of sexual satisfaction, so that's important for me...
FungaSafari
More than a month ago"LadyDragon" seems to have the nail on the head – ouch! Focussing on the male dilemma. The one-eyed trouser snake seems to have a mind of its own – rearing its ugly head when not required and lying dormant when action is called for. Seeing that the male member has the attributes of an eye and mind, perhaps the male member is much better attuned to beauty being in the eye of the beholder.
IVAONE60
More than a month agoLoved you're article.
ReplyI am dating an older woman and let me tell you. Our sex life is great plus we get on really well together. Nothing wrong with an older woman.
JackNP
More than a month agoWomen in their 40s, 50s and 60s are incredible.
ReplyMindfood2
More than a month agoConfidence is Sexy
60s is the new 40s
Loving life,
Mind Body and Soul
Never loose that passion and intimacy
I enjoy reading your topic...Eva
Thank Uxx
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Replyexportme
More than a month agoConfidence and love of your own body is the key. Fully agree
Devilsgrin
More than a month agoI don't know who that was written for or what age or what gender but come on really? First thing is no mention of Helen Mirren, sexy as hell, hands down winner for older Hottie!! I'm all for empowering women of all ages and I know there are some idiots about but any man would know not to say any of those things to any woman and older woman are sexy and hot, most guys I know have no problem with older women? Where do you do your research it seemed like old news or at least information which I thought would be common sense and plain old manners? Like I said before , even the dumbest of the dumb wouldn't say "you must miss the tight perky body of your youth? I like and agree older women are hot and sexy but who doesn't know that? If there are guys out there who don't now what was in that article, they'd be so stupid they wouldn't be able to even read it? Did I really need to read that? No I don't think so?
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ReplyDeliciousEva
More than a month agoWhere do I do my research...
Hmmm... Perhaps being a 40+ year old woman, with quite a large number of friends in the same age and gender bracket could be a clue.
Also the fact I've been writing dating and sex articles for 20 years and have been receiving letters, emails, and comments from people for the same amount of time.
Or it could be this was also a suggested topic by a number of women in that age bracket asking for it...
But who knows, random man on the internet. Who knows....
Maybe I just made it up
:)
Account Closed
More than a month agoYou'd be surprised..
KinkyGirl101
More than a month agoGotta love it when a man tells us that we're obviously delusional about what's being said to us. And yes it is dumb to make these comments ... isn't that the point of the article. And yet *sigh* they still get said.
crustynugget
More than a month agoMature is sexy lets forget "old" it only exists once you are past thinking and being able to function physically and sexually. With age comes beauty of the mind and a very sensual awakening of the body. To all those beautiful sexy mature ladies out there stay sexy, don't bow to anybody telling you how you should be as you are deemed too old. Rebel against the doomsayers!!!
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ReplyMindfood2
More than a month agoWell said
I totally agree
Thank U
Regards to your sexy mind body and soul
Lolly
hotbajan
More than a month agoI'm sorry but any guy who says anything like those to a lady is plain and simply a twit. I find women who are secure in their own skin, don't have anything to prove, with a stable head on their shoulders and no great attitude an immediate turn on. Especially when they have real curves! 80% of the time that equates to a mature lady! Most younger women could learn sooo much from mature women. Most of the truly memorable playmates and lovers I have had from my 20s to now have been middle aged and older women.
ReplyAmante.
More than a month agoI am a WHIP - Woman who is Hot, Intelligent and in her Prime!
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ReplyKinkyGirl101
More than a month agoI've not heard that before ... love it!
mung2013
More than a month agoLove it
Account Closed
More than a month agoLove that
Steve0112
More than a month agoI would agree with that
Yellowhite
More than a month agoLiterally who the f*%# says any of those things to a woman?
Replymrjez41
More than a month agothe real thing is older women know what they want and they have better sex as experience is the best
ReplyDesirable4u
More than a month ago50 + and still Loving everything about Sex & Sexuality and at a mature age were generally very in tune with ourselves. Body mind & soul..
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agoYummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmy!
MissMasBeach
More than a month agoAll I can say to all you 20 and 30 year old men out there is - boy are you ever in for a treat when you start playing with women in their 40s, 50s and 60s!
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month ago100% agreed. Women in their 50's and 60's are amazing!
mell1966
More than a month agoSo true
virgo873
More than a month agoA week ago I logged on and found a message from a guy in his early forties that simply said "Hi, just curious.... Do you still enjoy having sex at your age?"
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Replybarkly48
More than a month agoHaha... and you're on this site for? I wonder if in 20 years he will still be enjoying sex? You just keep up the good work.. haha
nightrider219
More than a month agoThey're gorgeous, I love the mature ladies and all the curves mmm bbw mature is my choice any day , getting hard thinking about it now xx
ReplyBlue262
More than a month agoJennifer Aniston turns 40, interviewers can't leave it alone.
Owen Wilson turns 40, three months earlier, nobody mentions it.
Mixing up youth, health and beauty is unhelpful.
You can be young, healthy and ugly, as well as having no personality.
Katherine Hepburn's beauty was always shown in her structure, the way she spoke and moved.
I've seen people looking busted at 29, bad luck and a simple family tree.
Men adore women for being women, women value men. Training men to only go by looks has to be some sort of abuse, i've known models who had the heart of a scorpion, but were treated well purely because they had looks. Also been around beautiful young people who were just annoying, still working out things and learning to be themselves. If life was simple it'd be no fun, right?
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agoWell Said ox
Redraven67
More than a month agoI am what i am.....
I am my own special creation........
Im 52 and havent felt better....
Loving life right now..........
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ReplyLuluandHarry
More than a month agoI’m with ya in that one!
Stressfreefun35
More than a month agoYou are a wonderful spirit!
BUSAbeast
More than a month agotry being a dude in your 50's, most woman have a cut off age of 50
even though theyre in their 50's themselves, I mean, Im still as sprite and energetic
as I was when I was 49. :-)
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Replymell1966
More than a month agoI think there are some woman who have had bad experiences with older guys so we get treated like them .I am into quality not quanty
Kind67
More than a month agoLove this it's so true. Mature is sexy whatever the age.
ReplyBrendanstime
More than a month agoThe experience of time is a beautiful thing
ReplyKinkyGirl101
More than a month agoAnother fab article. And guys I would much rather be told "you look great" than "you look great for your age".
Reply2444funtimes
More than a month agoAmen to that!
ReplyI am tired of younger men saying they want me to 'teach them' how to be good lovers. I'd tell them to stop watching porn (free and readily available wasn't around when I was 'learning') and actually speak to real women about what they like and what turns them on and vice versa. Everyone has different needs so it is a continuous learning curve.
Personally speaking....whilst young men 20's to mid 30's are 'hot' I find men 40 + to be sexy...there's a bit difference .
barkly48
More than a month agoI like the way you (Eva) write... and always a good read, and this one is as well, but..... (and I'm not suggesting you are stretching the truth at all, (heaven forbid, we all know where that can lead!!)), are there really guys/blokes who say those sort of things, particularly in the context of a sex/dating site? Really? How on earth would anyone expect to "get lucky" after saying "I'd be too much for you to handle"? And the same with "older women have lost their sex appeal". It's more likely that women would say the first 2,but even so, it's none of anyone's business. Being on the other side of 60, I would love to be dating a 40something, (and getting high fives from my imaginary friends),....!!
However I have been guilty of using the "you are in great shape", but I've never gone on to say "for your age"... I think, (and please correct me), that this is a compliment, and should be accepted as such. That is how I intended it, but I don't get too many thank-yous so maybe it has been taken the wrong way. I might have to curtail my appreciations of the female body, and keep them to myself...!
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agoUndermoderated who is to judge how we shoukd look at any age. It may be a compliment but it is a backhanded one. Why can't we look amazing at any age and especially as we age. I look better now than I did at 25 because I have the conference I lacked at that age.
AmyF2016
More than a month agoBarkly...believe it things like "you look good for your age"get told to women...and thats one of the more polite sentences.
Despite it being a casual site there are a lot of men that liken the women on here as unpaid hookers and approach us as so.
Now " how to approach a woman on here and what NOT to say" would be a valuable article
barkly48
More than a month agoOr AmyF2016, "how to approach a woman on here and what TO say" would be even better.... haha
AMM.Editor
More than a month ago@barkly48 check out the articles by Chris Manak, Cam Langdon and Nicole Carrington about online dating and how to approach women. There are lots of suggestions about first approaches and how to stand out from the crowd. Hint: "Hey I've given you access to my Private Gallery" is the laziest approach on this site.
Account Closed
More than a month agoAmy - you're so hot! xxx
Mrshey
More than a month agoOn point so sick of hearing I look great for my age. Please tell me how am I meant to look for my age? Will and do wear whatever I am comfortable in and more often than not it is something sexy and shows my body. I am unapologetic about what I do and who i am its taken me 47 yrs to be comfortable with it so screw convention!
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agoWell said! Once upon a time... I met a lovely, sexy, flirty woman in a library. She was just gorgeous! We had dinner, laughed and she invited me to stay at her house (I was backpacking). What a loving, sensual, sexual night we had. We became friends. She is a Goddess! Being 72 was completely and utterly irrelevant. ***Sigh***
Account Closed
More than a month agoGood on you missy. Why even entertain those comments. They’re not worthy of any time
You look great irrespective of your age. And judging by your profile I think you’d be a great person too.
Account Closed
More than a month ago"so sick of hearing I look GREAT for my age"
Oh puhlease, take it as a compliment ladies. People are literally surprised you're a certain age because you don't look like most women who are your age. That's all it is.
carbfree
More than a month agoWell said!
Sexy is what sexy does, it's not about the numbers of age, size or weight.
AmyF2016
More than a month agoReally Misshey?
Ive met you at a drinks night and all I thought was you look hawt as hell...youre age didnt even come into it lol
Account Closed
More than a month agoThanks AmyF2016 that's very kind of you to say. I was probably very insecure about how I looked then. These days I don't care take me or leave me I like who I am and I'm comfortable in my own skin.
SweetDesire26
More than a month agoThanks Eva love it and your spot on . I been with some young men who say i blow the young girls to pieces cause of my sexiness and hot passion . Too feel comfortable in your own skin is a great way to be sexy .
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agoThat’s so true. Experience is very sexy me says.
Aussiebloke50
More than a month agoYou definitely are sweet . We had an awesome time. Your sexual desire was such a turn on. Loved every minute
ETouch2019
More than a month agoI'd even go as far as removing the word "mature"........they're simply women. Whilst on the topic of age there definitely is something sexually magical about a woman in her 40s and 50s. I was very young the first time I fucked with a 40+ year old and remember it fondly......in the end I think it was less about her age and more about her attitude. Today these same women, with experience and a great erotic attitude continue to delight me!
ReplyMaid.In.Oz
More than a month agoBeing a lady of that age I would have to agree with most of what you've said though I have to laugh about the guys who tell me they're into older women but wont put that in their profile, lolol
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Replyispywithmy
More than a month agoI can’t speak for every guy, but it’s difficult to know what to put in a profile. If we do put that line in, we have one group judging us saying that we are misogynist pigs.
If we don’t, we’ll we are just looking for a quick hook up.
It also offends some ladies to even mention that they are middle aged or older/mature.
I genuinely prefer women who are a little further on in life/ have more life experience. But even if you’re in that ladies age range, usually I cop something from the above list, when my intentions are genuine.
Just another negative of this environment.
rboy01
More than a month agoI love older women, and if they what to flirt well so be it
Reply