How to Get More Sex Using Adult Dating Sites

Cam Langdon Cam Langdon on 6 February 2012    35 comments
Handsome young man lying in bed with his hands behind his head looking satisfied

Are you using adult dating sites with the motive of increasing the amount of sex you get? Or, have you joined an adult dating site to just get “any sex” because you are currently like the proverbial Nun, i.e. gettin’ none?

If you answered yes to either of these questions, then I have some fantastic news for you. And it doesn’t matter if you are male or female, gay, bisexual or straight. And that good news is – there are thousands of like-minded folks out there with exactly the same agenda as you. There is no need to feel any guilt about your desire to meet people online for the exclusive purpose of having sex with them. Put aside any hang-ups you may have about your urges and desires. You are perfectly normal, and so are the other horny folk out there just waiting to meet you.

But before we start targeting and contacting every person that takes our fancy as a potential sex partner, slow down and take a breath. You still need to approach the matter with a bit of strategic thought.

Yes, I know I said there are thousands out there waiting for you to contact them for sex. But there are others out there competing with you for the same thing. Many guys (and girls) scare off potential fuck buddies by being way over the top, both in their profiles and their initial contacts.

Here are some simple guidelines that will boost your chances of getting sex – fast and regularly – with women and men you meet online.

Be Sex Positive but Respecful in your Approach

Many women and men love dirty talk and a filthy mind. But, you will get more responses and, consequently, sex by working your way up to this level of intimacy. Guys, never put on your profile that you are looking for multiple sex partners, that you are a love-making machine, or any of that crap. And girls, don’t write that you are looking to fuck as many men as you can. That might get you lots of responses, but think about the kind of guys that would be replying to a profile like that. Creeps, mostly. Once you have established some communication with a person, you will know instinctively how much of a potty-mouth you can be later. And once this comfort level is established, then you can go for broke in your explicit sexual language.

Keep Your Dirty Photos for the Private Gallery

It’s sometimes not the best idea for men to post shirtless or sexy photos (what you think makes you look sexy and reality may be poles apart) of themselves on their profiles unless they really have the ripped body of a male model. Women, too, should keep their main profile area a skank-free zone. Guys, you can post all the cock pics you like in your private gallery. Ladies, you can also put your titty and pussy shots in you private gallery, if you feel that way inclined. Of course, once you hook someone you want to have sex with, give them access to these intimate photos to spark their sense of urgency.

Set a Deadline for Filtering Time Wasters

A lot of women, and even guys, are full of fake bravado online. Bearing that in mind, set yourself a timeframe for meeting the potential sex partners you are communicating with, and if they keep stalling, move onto someone else. Some people are living a cyber fantasy online and have no intention of meeting you – they are either married or have some other issues. There are enough genuine X-rated folks on your dating site to give you the sex you crave.

Target People in a Different Age Bracket

Guys, the phenomenon of the cougar is real and growing. AMM, for example, has lots of females who are of mature years and seeking guys that can keep them satisfied sexually. So, if you are a younger guy and looking for quality sex from experienced ladies that won’t drive you mad with emotional bullshit, you would be well advised to include the older babes in your searches. And, if you are a more mature man, the opposite is also true. Studies into the online dating habits of younger women show that they appreciate the sexual skills that an older gentleman can bring to the bedroom. In short, men and women these days are quite content to ignore age gaps when it comes to getting it on in the bedroom.

Make the First Sexual Encounter a Pleasant One

If you find a great little rooter online, don’t spoil your chances of getting a repeat performance with her (or him). The two main ways people stuff up in this area are:

Drinking too much. If you get totally wasted and can’t get it up, fall asleep or chuck all over your brand new fuck buddy, you will probably never see them again. Keep the alcohol for after you get your rocks off, not before.

Lack of hygiene. I’ve heard plenty of horror stories from women who meet guys online to have sex with them, only to be shocked by a total lack of genital hygiene. Guys, women don’t like sucking dirty penises. So guys (and girls) make sure everything is clean, trimmed and sparkling downstairs if you want more sex from the people you meet online.

If you have the right mindset and target appropriately, there is no reason you shouldn’t be putting more notches on your bedpost after meeting and having sex with people you meet online.

Remember, there are thousands of potential randy women and men out there, and the only thing preventing you from meeting some of them for fun, erotic encounters is a lack of attention to detail and a lazy attitude. Follow the above advice, and target thoughtfully and appropriately. You will then find you are getting all the sex you can handle – and then some!

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Comments (35)

  • SirGalahazard

    SirGalahazard
    Account closed

    How does one get around the contemporary perception that "guys must have hairless bodies" nowadays without going through the trouble of a full body wax?
    >4w
    • funseeker407

      funseeker407
      Account closed

      I have found just using a bear trimmer downstairs does the job. Keeps it all looking tidy. Get someone to trim excessive back hair etc with clippers. It is cheaper and less painful than waxing.
      >4w
    Reply
  • gmds2

    gmds2
    Account closed

    Pretty standard issue stuff really.
    >4w
    Reply
  • Floyd.Rose

    Floyd.Rose
    51M Annandale, NSW,
     AU

    I have always followed the guidelines you have mentioned in your little script. BUT you let out one thing. All of what you say is true and correct but I still get very little in the way of responses if any at all. And I am an intelligent decent looking and behaving bloke. So what you missed out is the fact that as a male on her you have to "Carpet bomb" every night. That means send as many emails as you can. it's roughly 1 reply to every 20 sent
    >4w
    Reply
  • Justmeanyou

    Justmeanyou
    Account closed

    Clippers and Cream
    >4w
    Reply
  • takemetoyou

    takemetoyou
    Account closed

    it is a nice article,but in practical women/couples are too much stressed or conscious to meet a guy. Wish after see this article the scenario get changed.
    >4w
    Reply
  • nickyeahhh

    nickyeahhh
    Account closed

    ive got plenty of sex off here and still am it's hectikkk ;)
    >4w
    Reply
  • paddy138

    paddy138
    Account closed

    It doesnt matter what I say, what age they are How big they are all responses are the same.
    >4w
    Reply
  • SirGalahazard

    SirGalahazard
    Account closed

    Gee, 1 in 20 is a pretty good hit rate if you ask me!
    >4w
    Reply
  • Dave4615

    Dave4615
    61M Drummoyne, NSW,
     AU

    been on under a week and already had a date
    >4w
    Reply
  • BillyBoy59

    BillyBoy59
    Account closed

    what do you really mean with this line..."and have no intention of meeting you – they are either married or have some other issues." Either married or have some other issues? Jesus, I'm married to a woman with low libido and just want some fun away from home. Is that so wrong? Maybe I'm on the wrong site. Most "cougars" are wounded divorcees or separated and will not go near a married man. Pity a really, as "we" do have something to give.
    >4w
    • mars62

      mars62
      62F Adelaide, SA,
       AU

      I personally have been told by one gent on here that I'm too choosy ,that I need to loosen up.. I would consider myself the most easy going person I know. As for a relationship with a married man, sometimes that is more preferable. You don't need to worry about forming an attatchment. I've had many encounters with the married/attatched male in the 8 months I've been here. Bring it on I say...
      >4w
    Reply
  • zonavar

    zonavar
    Account closed

    I have been using this site on and off for about 5+ years and so far have had zero contacts turn into actual meet-up's, etc. for friendship or developing intimate relationships. More than 80 percent of responses to introductory messages are 'thanks but you are not what I am looking for' replies. It's definitely true that a lot of the females on here and other sites want 'perfect' men and if, like me, you're not in the alpha-male category in terms of physical appearance, that ticks you off 99 percent of the potential respondent's 'watch lists'. I try to be myself and present as who I really am. Perhaps that sort of honest approach is overwhelming? Not really sure.
    >4w
    Reply
  • tanned97

    tanned97
    54M Adelaide, SA,
     AU

    What a waste of time this article was......i want my 5 minutes back..so i can get rejected by more ladies
    >4w
    Reply
  • sexywisey

    sexywisey
    60M Prospect, SA,
     AU

    Billy boy and cumfybanana, i a hearing you and both of you are 100% correct
    been on here for about way to long, spent way too much and got way too little return
    >4w
    Reply
  • Leolady727

    Leolady727
    Account closed

    Billyboy - many women do not like cheaters, zonavar - you're profile makes you sound like a complete tosser - THIS is why you guys are not having much luck.
    >4w
    Reply
  • LathamMan

    LathamMan
    Account closed

    Hygiene is a two way street.
    >4w
    Reply
  • NoHarmInAsking

    NoHarmInAsking
    Account closed

    "MORE SEX", fuck I couldn't get any less !!!
    >4w
    Reply
  • B.LGuyOz

    B.LGuyOz
    Account closed

    I do agree with some of the comments here, been on here for awhile and the experience isn't great, half of the responses I get are the same "sorry but you are not what Im looking for" I do read the profile before contacting and I have done everything from all the advices they give about how to get the most response and almost all the messages I send are not read or you get no response back. There is always a new article on how to but still the responses are the same. I guess I'm gonna keep on trucking
    >4w
    Reply
  • VICTA6975

    VICTA6975
    Account closed

    Thanks Cam Langdon for the great advice, I don't intend to sound negative people but this whole process seems futile. I have tried a few different approaches now regarding my profile content and actual message to a woman and i'm still not having any luck. Sorry I can't work women out? if you try to make conversation with a woman and even be complimentary like "hello how are you? you're very attractive, what do you do for work? what are your hobbies etc" I am generally ignored! they must think that I am boring and seeking marriage but when you mention "sex" even if they mention that they just want casual sex and flaunt their sexy body parts the sheer mention of sex from a guy turns them right off and they think you're a sleezy creep I just don't get it? women just seem to go the complete opposite of what a guy says and wants just for the sake of it. I have been so nice to women by trying to make conversation and complimenting them on how beautiful and sexy they are and I very rarely even receive a reply. This is very frustrating and cruel as I am a nice fun guy with nice things to offer. Most women definitely prefer the bad boy image I think but even if you were to portray the bad boy image online they probably won't believe you and prefer to meet bad boys in public I think. Why I will never understand? I am NOT a bad boy by any stretch of the imagination, I am kind, respectful and enjoy pleasuring a woman immensely. There are plenty of bad and abuse men out there that give women hell but women seem to put up with that treatment for a long time even going to the extremes of defending him when he is criticised and dare I say one little thing wrong and it's all over for me! it's very strange. Women seem to think that nice guys are weak, desperate and pathetic and therefore just get treated like an idiot. Just remember people the higher the expectation in life the greater the disappointment. I think that Cams information should be made available strictly to the males ONLY ;-)
    >4w
    • allinmymind

      allinmymind
      61F Wodonga, VIC,
       AU

      You need to change the type of women you chase that is all. Try to figure out which ones will treat you like this and which ones won't. If you hang out in chat you can see it after awhile, though maybe I can see it better from a distance.
      >4w
    Reply
  • jayson1767

    jayson1767
    54M Mudgee, NSW,
     AU

    The biggest thing I have herd from woman( and after seeing some of the guys profiles on here ) I have to agree with the woman ! Woman feel like they are being treated like pieces of meat and frankly as as guy I think that is disgusting ! Just because a woman puts nude pics up of her boobs and pussy does not mean they want to be disrespected or treated like a slut ! However that is what guys do and you guys out there wonder why woman won't talk to you ! Hell I am a guy and like all guys, I do think of sex but shit there is more to life than sex ! However most of the guys on these dating sites have no respect for woman and only want to get their load off ! Then when an actual gentleman gets on these dating sites ; the tools out there have pissed the woman off that much they don't know who to believe !! For all those tools ; wake up and stop treating woman like shit !!! Is that how your mother bought you up !?....... A woman still wants to be romanced and treated with respect and I believe if you give respect then it will be returned ! To those ladies who have been disrespected and treated like meat ; I am sorry that guys like that even live !!
    >4w
    Reply
  • allinmymind

    allinmymind
    61F Wodonga, VIC,
     AU

    I think the snipe about married is unjust. But then again it holds me back, or in reality if I wasn't married I wouldn't have an excuse, so the issue is with me and what I think about the whole idea. I have heard of those with bravado that don't come through, how many are married, come on. Are you talking guys or chicks?
    In my experience being married, many expect me to be the exact opposite and it is hard to live down.
    >4w
    Reply
  • Obsession8u

    Obsession8u
    Account closed

    I think my profile is pretty clean an decent,thought it may attract some desires,,but haven't even had a hit, in saying that I'm only a basic member..
    Check it out would love to know your thoughts lady's,, cheers
    >4w
    Reply
  • acwotam

    acwotam
    Account closed

    And when you've done all of the above, and you're still getting not so much as the courtesy of a response from your messages.... what then? One thing not mentioned is that while there may well be "thousands" out there all looking for the same thing, 90% of them are male. So the females can pick and choose the cream of the crop. Those of us mere males who don't fall into that category, or boast a massive dick and/or bank balance, might as well not exist.
    >4w
    • allinmymind

      allinmymind
      61F Wodonga, VIC,
       AU

      You made three separate points there. First you made an assumption or the article made one that girls are ready to just cough it up if the bloke is right. An Canadian site similar to this said desperate women do that. So is the bank balance related to social reasons like having a better time before sex, then bring up the question is the good time about sex or something else or both? Or for my relationship reasons or both? I don't pick from the cream, not my style. The ones that get somewhere often work at it and think.
      >4w
    • WarrenD

      WarrenD
      Account closed

      I agree 100% with acwotam
      >4w
    • tallguy1965

      tallguy1965
      Account closed

      I Know exactly what you are saying and I understand
      However I think (not that others should) that the guys who are more attractive to the wonderful women here are the ones that sell themselves
      Those guys may not be nice guys and they may not be anything like what they sell them selves as
      But they do it well
      Unless like me you never promote yourself your chances are limited and your survival on chat are negative
      We should just accept that guys who are not into promoting themselves or just ordinary guys have to wait in line lol
      Promote yourself or just accept that you are who you are
      Hope this does not offend anyone
      >4w
    Reply
  • Slimshaddy

    Slimshaddy
    Account closed

    I use to be a paid member of AMM 5 years ago and I managed to meet 3 stunning girls at the time; I have recently returned and it seems like there is far less women online this time; like usual a huge amount of men to compete with; AMM is more a couples seeking couples site these days.. or have i lost a bit in the attraction section i dont know ?
    >4w
    Reply
  • GentlemanWolf

    GentlemanWolf
    Account closed

    I find courtesy, respect and valuing a female as a lady is paramount. Like my username suggests, Im a gentleman on the street and a wolf bettween the sheets =)
    Im more than happy with the site and plenty of very nice ladies =D
    >4w
    Reply
  • Handyguy84

    Handyguy84
    Account closed

    Well guys flattery gets you some where I've found be respectful towards women open and honest I've had some mixed success on this site just by being myself basically if your a complete tosser that's your problem not the other persons do something about that change your ways don't dive in head first for a hook up take time to get to know a person make a connection if there are any women who read this comment I think quiet a few would agree so guys smarten up
    >4w
    Reply
  • AGivingSpirit

    AGivingSpirit
    64M Batemans Bay, NSW,
     AU

    Getting the date is easy if you use the sales bucket theory.
    You speak with 40 ( send a unique question to each about their profile,compliment them on their appearance, suggest perhaps a coffee meet near them) you will get from 5 to 10 responses,then return their message when they are offline suggest your favorite gift ask them where they want to meet and a compliment and question about their profile(shows you have studied their profile not just looked at the pictures be charmingingly sensual !) out of those five play messaging with you. YOU will get a date aim to stay at theirs( by offering your landscape gardening skills for free ) on second or third date put Tim Buckley's Sweet Surrender on replay if she likes it your in for a kiss and hug my sensuality with my sexuality skills (injaculation not ejaculation) PREFER ladies older than me SOo eclectically elegant ladies please VIEW my PROfile and share your thoughts. AGivingSpirit
    >4w
    Reply
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