Why it's ok to Multi-Date

Adult Match Maker on 22 December 2016    28 comments
Young couple texting each other as they sit on separate park benches

Having a few people on the go at once is a lot like a wine tasting. And who doesn’t love a good wine tasting? You take a few sips from each one, and decide which varieties you prefer. At the end of the day, you can either pick a favourite and go home with a bottle (or the whole case, we’re not judging), or simply wander off into the sunset in the search for the next vineyard to do it all again tomorrow. 

And these days, dating more than one person at a time is just about as common as wine tasting – and just as delicious. 

Why you should date multiple people at once

These days, with online adult dating becoming increasingly popular, members on sites such as Adult Match Maker can browse profiles and potentially set up a date for every night of the week.

Think about how many dates you’ve gone on in your lifetime. Even if you get on well enough to go for a second, third or fourth date, how many of them turn into real relationships? 

The truth is that the majority of first dates won’t end up anywhere serious, so why not enjoy the fun of a few first dates at once? When those first dates progress to regular dating – and let’s be honest, regular sex – you get all the benefits of the fun parts of a relationship without any of the commitment or awkward talks. This time is completely about you, so enjoy it!

How to date more than one person

To make sure you and your partners really do get the most out of the experience, there are a few golden rules to stick to.

  1. Be honest. It might be tough to bring up your dating situation, but it would be much tougher to bring it up further down the track when your date thinks you’re on the verge of getting serious. By all means, if you want to take that step, go right ahead – but until that point, you’ll need to be honest about your multi-dating status or just wanting a fuck buddy and what it means. 
  2. Use protection. Don’t muck around with STIs, ever. The dating game can be a lot of fun, but it tends to be the best idea to only trust yourself when it comes to keeping healthy. If your partner doesn’t like the idea of condoms, cut and run, because they probably don’t like the idea of condoms with any of their other partners, either. 
  3. Don’t say things you don’t mean. Telling someone you may become interested in a relationship when you don’t mean it does not count as being kind, it only means you are leading them on. 

What not to do

  1. Don’t go feeling all guilty! Once you’ve opened up and been honest about what you’re doing, there’s no reason to feel like you’re cheating anyone out of anything. If your date wants to see you regardless of your dating habits, that’s completely up to them. 
  2. Don’t talk about one date to another. They need to know that you may be dating others, but nothing further. Even if there are few to zero feelings involved and you’re only in it for the sex, crossing wires is a total dating faux pas and should be avoided at all costs. Keep those chats for your besties. 
  3. Don’t try to take on too many. You’ll get a feel for it pretty quickly, but remember that you’ll probably need to spend time with each person at least once a week. Unless you’re planning on giving up on your friends, work, and family, more than three can start to become a superheroic effort. Although if you do manage it, please tell us how! 
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Comments (28)

  • Leolady727

    Leolady727
    Account closed

    I always say there's a reason why "monogamy" and "monotony" sound so similar ;-)
    >4w
    • wishtolive

      wishtolive
      Account closed

      Leo thats is soooooo funny....and true lol
      monogamy.....i was one that used to think there is no other way. Now i see it very differently. Different facets in different people and sampling some of those carying traits is something that I have come realise is hugely positive......not dating as such as i have a man but if i do meet for a drink and poss something else i will always state that i am in a relationship.
      >4w
    • whycoffee

      whycoffee
      Account closed

      priceless quote can i use it
      >4w
    • sweeth3art

      sweeth3art
      Account closed

      Whereas I tend to think boring people lead boring (sex) lives regardless of their relationship status ;)
      >4w
    • Melody2973

      Melody2973
      Account closed

      Nothing wrong with monogamy :))
      Agree, 'maybe boring people have no idea they have boring sec ;)
      >4w
    Reply
  • cumonmytits7171

    cumonmytits7171
    54F Mango Hill, QLD,
     AU

    Amen! Until the word "exclusive" is thrown in to the mix, then what is the harm? As long as there is transparency, honesty, openness.
    And just because one is dating a few/seeing a few, does NOT mean one is sleeping with each person you date (I know I don't)
    >4w
    Reply
  • Sneaktcactus80

    Sneaktcactus80
    44M Sydney, NSW,
     AU

    Before a first date my statement is.......I've learnt that monogamy isn't suited to me and i can't be caged......this is not the first thing i say but it is dropped into the conversation before the date so the awkwardness is minimum
    >4w
    Reply
  • Melody2973

    Melody2973
    Account closed

    I think monogamous relationships are wonderful :)), I don't expect to ' date ' anyone off a site like this :), I think most men are out to try new things and you have to aware of that :),
    >4w
    Reply
  • Benefits76

    Benefits76
    Account closed

    My experience has been that most women expect monogamy once we have been intimate. I never kiss and tell and I will always be committed once I'm in an exclusive relationship but it's not something that is easy to discuss. I'm always honest when asked but it's a difficult subject particularly when emotions are starting to surface. The key for me is to be honest - the challenge is the timing of the conversation. For me it is usually after the first physical encounter because really until then it's pointless.
    >4w
    Reply
  • Looklustlick

    Looklustlick
    Account closed

    I have a few FWB and they all know the existence of the others and would still welcome the love of my life if I ever find her
    >4w
    Reply
  • Hypno13

    Hypno13
    55M QLD,
     AU

    Is 30 excessive?
    >4w
    • sweeth3art

      sweeth3art
      Account closed

      Good question...which only you can answer, but fact you've asked is sign that you know there's an issue? Goodluck mate.
      >4w
    Reply
  • Sweetkiss502

    Sweetkiss502
    55F Leumeah, NSW,
     AU

    I really hate it when i get asked how many have you meet when was your last hook up i dont ask them this is a sex site im not on hear for numbers im on hear to have clean healthy adult fun , next lol
    >4w
    Reply
  • Wouldueatme

    Wouldueatme
    Account closed

    yeah......Let's be realistic, this isn't kindergarten You know what where you have come Too and what your looking for, so what makes you think other's aren't doing exactly the same. Just be up front about it.
    >4w
    Reply
  • ninjamoves

    ninjamoves
    Account closed

    multidate & masturbate ..that I rate
    >4w
    Reply
  • latebloomers1

    latebloomers1
    Account closed

    Mrs Latebloomer thinks monogamy is unnatural and not suited to the human race.
    >4w
    Reply
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