So you want to have a threesome! What you need to know.
Eva Sless
on 10 January 2016
84 comments
When it comes to enhancing your sex life one of the most fun things to do is add another body or two into the mix, but it can also be one of the most confusing and sometimes risky ventures you will take. There are so many things to think about. So many different dynamics. Not only physical, like where do all the legs go and why is there always an elbow digging in somewhere, but emotional too. Things like will jealousy become a factor? What if I don't like it or change my mind halfway through? What if my partner decides they like our playmate more than me?
Sometimes it can be such a minefield of what ifs and doubts it can turn you off trying it out at all, just in case it all goes wrong.
If you're in a relationship the most important thing to do when you're thinking about inviting another person into your bed is to talk to your partner about it first. And when I say talk I mean really talk. Just saying you want one isn't enough, and your partner agreeing with you is also not enough. I mean, sure, that's the first step, knowing you both want to do it, but it's not the only thing you need to consider. Here are a few basic points and questions that are very important in the decision making process and will help you to see if you're ready to do it and, more importantly, to make sure you're both on the same page as to what you want, how you want it and what you'll get out of it.
Firstly you should probably work out what gender you want the extra person to be. It might sound like a silly thing but if you're all pumped for a threesome with two guys and your boyfriend thinks you mean two girls, well let's just say things could get awkward.
Secondly you should talk about what it is you both want to get out of it. “Lots of orgasms” is an okay answer (I mean isn't that why we all have sex anyway?), but not really what I'm talking about. What I mean is asking questions about what you want and expect to happen.
Things like:
- Is it about watching your partner be with someone else?
- Is it about having your partner watch you?
- Is it about exploring a same sex experience for you, or your partner?
- Are there any things you don't want to do?
- Are there things you don't want your partner to do?
Knowing your personal and relationship boundaries is really important. The good thing about it is they can be open to change and evolution, but they are definitely needed. The last thing you want, when knee-deep in threesomey goodness, is to see your partner doing something you really don't want them to do. It could be as simple as them kissing the other person, but if it's something that makes you uncomfortable and gets that green-eyed monster out then it's most likely going to ruin the experience for everyone involved. Also talking to your future playmates about these sorts of things is a good idea. They too will have boundaries and expectations and questions, and the more open you are with them and the more discussion you have about what you all want and expect the better the whole thing will be.
But (I hear you saying) what if you think you're going to be okay with certain things and then you find out that really you're not. Is it okay to change your mind halfway through?
Yes it is, because sex should always be enjoyable and consensual and if you're finding that it isn't then you have every right to stop. Of course, saying something like “I'm feeling a bit uncomfortable can we stop for a while” is always a better idea than screaming “You bastard how DARE you do that” and running out of the room. Trust me. I've been in both situations and the former is always a way better way to deal with it.
But (I hear you saying again) what if I'm single? Do the rules change?
To be honest, no, not really. You still need to know what you want and what your boundaries are. You still need to be aware of the limitations your playmates might have and you need to be open and honest when discussing it with them. But you should also be aware that if things do get funny when you're with a couple, like someone starts to get jealous or feels left out, you might bear the brunt of someone's reaction to it. Again, I have been in that situation and it's not fun.
So once you've decided that you want to, and have agreed on your boundaries and expectations, the next step is finding someone to play with, and that's not as easy as you might think it is. Here are a couple of suggestions to get you started.
Playing with Friends
There are pros and cons for playing with friends. The pros being that you know and like these people. They are a part of your world and your circle and, if it all works out, could be a whole new beginning to Saturday afternoon BBQs. The cons are pretty much the same as the pros. You know and like these people, they are part of your world and your circle... And so, if things go wrong, it could totally change your friendships and make what were once fun and friendly Saturday afternoon BBQs a thing of the past.
Meeting Online
The pros are that adult dating is essentially a virtual pick and mix buffet where you can search for the perfect playmate. Someone who is exactly what you are looking for and who can help fulfil your desires. The cons are that often people online are not what they claim and it can turn into a long process to sort through the crap to actually find that diamond in the rough.
Going to a Party or Event
This is the actual pick and mix smorgasbord all you can eat buffet. Surrounded by people looking for pretty much the same thing you are. Bit of eye contact, a nod, and off you go! Well, it's not as simple as that... But it can be close. The cons come when the people you want to play with aren't interested in you, and the ones who are, just aren't your cup of tea. But the good thing is, there are parties and events almost every weekend, so you can always try again next time.
So what are you waiting for? Sit down and start the conversation tonight! You'll open up new doors, new excitement and put a whole lot more fun into your life... And when you think about it, that's what life is all about right?
84 comments
1969kitty
More than a month agoJust the article I needed right now! Thank you
ReplyHornman36
More than a month agoFantastic article Eva.
ReplyPisces.
More than a month agoHi Eva, thanks for that. I'll read the next article. Cheers
ReplyCURVYLOVER1
More than a month agoI Really enjoy MMF 3 somes and love the dynamics of 2 men and a women's with so much to enjoy.
ReplyI have a good male reliable friend that we do together with single women on occasions and sometimes with couples and had some fantastic experiences especially with ladies having there first MMF just go off!!! We love to Spitroast, DP , lick pussy under while fucking, with 3 people cumming together is mind blowing......we are always open for new adventures.
Pete & Dave
Slh2018
More than a month agoMy hubby is keen punish me with another man I’m excited and interested.anyone interested?
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ReplySarageorge99
More than a month agoI think that if things are ok I might be the perfect man
Luvwetsex
More than a month agoSounds like a fun time ,yes
Yaseraly
More than a month agoI never try before and would like to try threesome
ReplyJTP888
More than a month agoSure never tried it but sounds fun but two women and me no men. Sorry.
Replypeachypussy
More than a month agoMFM 3-somes are NOT for me - and even FFM 3-somes are conditional upon me being hopelessly infatuated with the female (wife or partner or girlfriend) of the male involved - and even then I'm very picky about the male/husband - I have to find myelf almost irresistibly drawn to his physical appearance, his intellect and his cultured behavior - if he's the type who grabs me by the hair and rides me doggy style like a bitch on heat, then that's the last I will see either of them again - ever, as I'm far more lesbian than bi-sexual. Despite that, I still want to have my cake and eat by having a foot in each camp - the lesbian (girls only) silo and the silo containing couples searching for a FFM 3-some. I'm happy to fellate a good looking man and allow him to have his (solo) way with me followed by his wife/partner joining the 2 of us.
ReplyHornylady7
More than a month agoI've had a few mmf mmf bi love cock that much and the way they please u omg it's amazing 2 cocks mmmmm the more the better lol
ReplyCentralWestCpl
More than a month agoMy first FMF threesome happened so naturally and was such fun for all of us. That’s what I most remember. Just the fun way we had enjoyed an evening out. Drinks on the balcony on a warm
ReplySummer evening. Some flirting and joking and then deciding each of us wanted to do it.
Have had other FMF and MFM since but the first was just such a lovely experience for two girlfriends and lucky me.
serendippit
More than a month agoDon't get too familiar with the third person. Too many occurrences of liaisons on the side!
ReplyChickenman220
More than a month agoYes yes yes
Reply3220couple
More than a month agoWE love 3somes, have enjoyed FFM & FMM and love the 3 way dynamic.
ReplyHenmvy2
More than a month agoActually for many folk this is not a fantasy. I'm a one on one person. Thats MY thing
ReplyGentlemanWolf
More than a month agoOne female being devoured and worshiped by 2 men...seeing the ecstacy and pleasure on her face...priceless.
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agoI agree I love being the rose between the thorns..Two men one women they can't go wrong, her reaching a orgasm is much higher having the extra work put into her erotic state.
I love mfm no bi sexual between the men at all though.
I've been married 29 years and we have only experienced this three times over the past 5 years and we are now looking to dabble a little more as we ain't getting any younger..
CumLover1966
More than a month agoWhy stop at three people , more people in group sex the better I say , but I know it's not for everyone but for me it's the best sex ever , the more men I can get together at the same time the better !
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agoYeah lovely Cumlover1966
luvcocks1977
More than a month agoHi what town you live in and when can we hook up
Account Closed
More than a month agoNo it’s not for everyone, honestly I’ve seen it with more people and I wouldn’t say it’s my thing.
friskypuz
More than a month agoA 3some is very fun,
ReplyHave been invited to be the extra F for FMF, and love the attention of having 2 men.
Recently joined in with 2 bi men, was good fun,
Either is great if we all like to share.
Monandra
More than a month agoThanks for the great article Eva Sless. Good way to learn, for people inexperienced like me and have no idea it works. MMF is in my bucket list. I hope I can find 02 nice guys for it.
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agoI will be more than happy to be 01
Hardicbang90
More than a month agoThoughts can be different
2SIRShareu
More than a month agoThreesomes our thing and we really like the dynamics of 2 men and lady, particurlary like the first time a lady is introduced to a ménage a trios and there raw excitement she experiences ... turns us on !
ReplySure it is every ladies fanatasy with so many pleasurable positions to be enjoyed together and made to feel special!
Icycupcake11
More than a month agoAs a girl my biggest dream is a mmf threesome. Think I can et it? Nope :(
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agomaybe your looking in the wrong places, or too fussy hun.
timwithbigcock
More than a month agostill wondering how the threesome experience would be....don't know from where to start
Replyluvmumma
More than a month agoi have never had one but am very interested in trying a MMF as I'm inexperienced I would like the males to be experienced and not bi it would be one of my fantasies for filled
ReplyPureoneclassic
More than a month agoI have had the pleasure of experiencing a MFM. With the right couple the whole night and day is such a turn on!! Guys if you are a little homophobic there really is not much point. The sexy woman is the centre of attention...
ReplyMerlinsboss
More than a month agoDoes anyone have some advice for a single male who is curious about being involved in an mfm scenario. I feel drawn simply by the social nature of such an experience although I am not bi. I have nearly met up with couples a number of times but I end up getting really anxious about the expectations. If this sounds really silly then I put my hand up. I'm silly.
ReplyFellator2145
More than a month agoI would love a MFM 3some where I can give oral to both.
Replywant2try3sums
More than a month agoim trying to
ReplyAsa.Is.Back
More than a month agoI must say, that I've experienced a number of threesomes (mostly mfm), but by far the best is the type where you build up a strong friendship first...through regular chatting (text, kik, etc) & flirting. That's what happened to me with the couple from my stories, & the connection made the sex so much better.
ReplyI agree that boundaries need to be discussed fully beforehand, by all involved. But also it's important to reassess boundaries from time to time if you plan or hope to continue the threesome as FWB. Sometimes, jealousy occurs later, or rules change as you all evolve.
The most important thing though is to make sure that if it's to be a threesome where all play, everyone is involved. Even if it means reigning in your own "fun" a bit to MAKE SURE the other person is included too.
SassnCheek
More than a month agoVery very difficult to find an interested woman who doesn't flake on meetings, especially if you don't seem to live in the Syd/Melb/Bris areas and therefore have an extremely small pool of available people.
ReplyZzzeus.
More than a month agoyes hmmm, think i have to update my profile, ide really love one, or is that two lols ?
Replyqick-e
More than a month agoi have had a couple of MFF encounters found it interesting and fun , have had one with a married couple where i was the extra guy lol still fun
ReplySassySandy
More than a month agoALWAYS ONLY had 2 males and myself....the absolute best way as no conflict with other woman in the picture as I've heard from others......rather enjoy than have cat fights hehe
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agohi,
saw yr pics just lik to say good on u for feelin young again.
Bi50yo
More than a month agoVery good I have had a few mmf 3 sums and found them ok to disappointing. A lot of men want and are exited by it. But most can only mange a half must pole and can not preform. Clubs are better than on line contacts we have always found.
ReplyPixxie1966
More than a month agoWell we are interested in a FFm 3some, but i cant believe women don't seem to want to wink us....... Maybe this site isn't as fair dinkum as we thought it to be. She has done it once and i want to .........
Replydick1313
More than a month agoMany Thanks Eva for the valuable information. I have been to threesomes, foursomes and manysomes groups and I find not parties are the same. Nevertheless, it's a fulfilling experience to see majority of the girls, guys and couples in their beautiful natural attire experiencing the ultimate sexual bliss. Cheers
ReplyAsa.Is.Back
More than a month agoI have had a number of very successful threesomes. But by far the best one has been written about in a story I submitted today....
Replyaccentlover
More than a month agoMy wife and I recently tried mfm. Found it exciting,the young man 15 yrs younger than us was respectful but seemed like he had ants in his pants,I mean jumping around everywhere and seemed like a bit of a pussy hog.We had an ok time and will try again with guy who is maybe a little older.
Replyleavinglasvegas
More than a month agoI have found it very hard to find a couple to join..perhaps because i am single, perhaps because i am in my 50's, perhaps because i have not done it before, probably a combination of all three things. I know that the full potential of my sexuality lies in that direction. Thanks for this article, it gives me renewed hope :)
Replysk1nnyk1d
More than a month agoI would say that what you have explained here is a very interesting read. My husband and I tried with a friend and I didn't like the experience. She ran the show but gave nothing back in return it was all about her. I stopped and walked off, my husband and her carried on but I was really pissed at the both of them especially my husband, he knew when I walked off that I was angry and he should have stopped. A few days later my girlfriend and I talked about it and I told her how I felt, she too knew I wasn't happy and it seemed like she was passing all the blame on my husband. I felt she wasn't being honest and was saying what she thought I wanted to hear. But in the end we made a deal it would never ever happen again for which it hasn't since, funny thing though my husband still wants another try at it but I won't let it and she neither he has been very persistent about it and thinks that if I talk to her and make her change her mind that things will be better. I'm sticking to my guns and won't let it mainly because we are great friends now and don't want our friendship to part. When we chat together sex always comes up and we tell each other what we fantasize about and watch the occasional porn videos and no we haven't been with each other, just close friends who actually now like talking about sex.
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ReplySweetangelic3
More than a month agoI have played with couples I have met on here throughout the years and have always had a great time.. generally finding out what limits they have first up so I don't rock their relationships... I have had where people would rather the male not to have intercourse with the extra or not kissing (fmf) or (mfm) where there is full contact or no mm contact.. it's about being honest.. Some women may like to have a lady play/go down on her but may not be a giver... still yet to try a swingers party but hey, one day time will permit
Account Closed
More than a month agoSounds like he’ll go there again because he clearly enjoyed it. I’d NEVER do it with a friend, you are just asking for trouble. I’d blame them both, eyes wide open .......
Account Closed
More than a month agoStick with your guns ..I have had a similar situation, but my friend said she would never go behind my back with my husband.
But I caught her looking at him giving him innuendoes that she wanted to sleep with him and I could see my husband becoming obsessed in the fantasy of having her..
She didn't want him, she wanted him to went her..
Ultimately it destroyed our friendship and almost my marriage and family..
Keep a watchful eye on both of them.
Because your husband is still wanting it again no matter how you feel.. His desire for her is strong and she would feel that coming from him..and enjoy the validation
Be careful all the best..
funready2
More than a month agoSadly not many are interested in older people.
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Replynath303
More than a month agoI'm interested. I love experienced women
Account Closed
More than a month agoI certainly haven't found that! Have had offers from 28yo upwards... been with 40yo to 69yo and really enjoyed most. Orgies, 3sum, couples mostly younger. It's all in the attitude - "play" is the appeal - MUST be fun!!!
Callan1988
More than a month agoYeah just go with flow & no like u love her but u & your have be tight with love and if their open 2 that stuff if you no what I mean (:
ReplyLothbrook
More than a month agoThank you that's a great insight for us and hope to use hints and get our man or women to join us
ReplyMussypair
More than a month agofirstly you must have a strong relationship with your partner. secondly not jealousy issues and that's both ways. we have had mfm on a number of occasions, i find great pleasure seeing the wife having multiple orgasms, lets face it guys girl keep going. it brings a smile to my face knowing shes having pleasure. and shes on with me having mf fun. but communication is a must
ReplyNewepisode
More than a month agoI've had MMF and still its better than 1 on 1 and look forward for MFF in near future
Replyrboy01
More than a month agoI've had a fair few 3some mfm, fmf and even moresome and loved every minute of them. Some can even last all night.
ReplySo just take your time and make sure everyone is having fun.
GenGuy73
More than a month agoHave experienced many threesomes in the form of mmf, but not ffm yet....still trying :D
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agoI've had FFM (and FFF) but never a truly successful MMF. Would love to have one to fulfill a certain long-standing fantasy
Darkstud
More than a month agoI'm new to a threesome experience. Would love to try and see what the fun is all about? Just don't know where to start.
Replyhotarse77
More than a month agoSo where do we sign up its so har
d to find our 1st .
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agoI'm having a MFF tomorrow - both are bi-curious
Iween1
More than a month agoI've helped a few ppl fulfill 3sum fantasies now. Ppl that may have never got around to it. It really is a pleasure seeing the reactions of a male being turned on and played with by two fems for the first time. It is a different experience to one in one. No doubt there. I like sensual play with couples my own age best - as in touching and feeling the others' bodies. But when the MILF wants to come out of me, I like to hold a young cock in each hand and indulge. What a pleasurable sexual journey I am on.
ReplyHedonisticX2
More than a month agoOne reason you did not mention is that my male partner, (MIke) is insaitable. I feel so bad when I am all done in, exhausted and all climaxed out after a couple of intense hours and he still has so much to give. I don't want him to miss out on feeling what I feel. I want him to feel as sated at the end of a love-making session as I am and getting a lovely young lady in to help me do that is an ideal situation for us. The lady and I can 'share the load' so to speak and everyone comes away happy and content. Carmen xx
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agoWhy does she need to be young? If you're serious about it, perhaps look older - broaden your search....good luck :)
Leolady727
More than a month agoHad several MFF threesomes - very enjoyable. Still hoping for a successful MMF - the ones I've had have been spoiled by the guys being freaked out my accidental male to male contact (which, let's face it, is bound to happen)
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Replyblueangela
More than a month agoTotally agree, that has happened with me as well, thanks.
Account Closed
More than a month agohehehe lol. Men are funny...straight women are expected to enjoy same sex play yet so many guys find the idea of "accidental touch" horrifying...who cares (it probably feel's nice too)
Plasir.d.Amour
More than a month agoOf course M/M contact will occur ,we ask "do you have issues with M/M contact most come straight out and say no, do you mind if I suck your cock. I say only if I can suck yours, Anne says I want to watch. Have had wonderful nights
Account Closed
More than a month agowe have had many mmf 3sums and had no problems
Account Closed
More than a month agoMMf threesomes are great fun if all are on the same page regarding MM contact. Its all good fun. I have had the pleasure of enjoying many threesome variations and look forward to more :)
Account Closed
More than a month agoMMF threesums are hot when you don`t have to worry about where a hand or mouth goes. What ever feels good right! We have had and also i been invited into a few bi mmf threesums,,, The girls love it as well!! Blows your mind!!! WOW!!!!
littleshy58
More than a month agoyes we love mmf 3 sums wife loves having 2 cocks to play with she loves the hot young guys the best
ReplySassySandy
More than a month agoOOOOOOO YES!!! MMF!! 2 hot cocks, been doing it for MANY years and LOVE it!!!!!
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ReplyAccount Closed
More than a month agowe are the same best ever 2 hot young cocks love it when they cum all over me
TannMatt
More than a month agoYou ladies have got my mind racing!! MMF is definitely on my wish list now!!!
abcplus1
More than a month agoThe sorting to find the diamond certainly rings true. But when you do it is a wonderful experience.
ReplyWe have also been fortunate enough to end up with new (platonic) Saturday BBQ friends as a result of the friendships formed.
Infamous.X
More than a month agoPersonally, I'm a threesome specialist! I really enjoy a couple being satisfied, in whatever way we choose to play. It helps if you like being watched too. ;)
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ReplyAMM.Editor
More than a month agoJob interview, "So what are your strengths?". "Well, I'm a threesome specialist" Love it!
Account Closed
More than a month agoToo funny :))))))
davidnolan64
More than a month agoI had several of those here and overseas and I found them enjoyable.
2sexymen4u
More than a month agoWe really enjoy a threesome experience with a hot sexy lady MMF fun & in particular a first timer! Always very exciting for all!
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