10 Tips to Make Your First Swingers Party a "F*CK YEAH" Experience!
Chantelle Austin
on 3 December 2014
9 comments
The first event is always the hardest because you don’t know what it’s going to be like, how you’re going to feel or even if you’ll have any fun. You’re not alone and everyone has a different experience but if you do these 10 things, then you’re stacking the odds in your favour of having a mind-blowing experience!
Dress to impress!
Know what looks good on you to accentuate your assets and minimise the parts you aren’t so excited about, and what underwear suits your shape. Wear the good stuff too, not just the everyday grundy undies (no really, don’t even wear those out of the house!)
Manscape/Galscape!
I’m not saying bush is bad (it’s not my personal preference) however; the majority of people in the swinging lifestyle are generally bush free to varying degrees. Manicured to completely hair-free is most common with those people also preferring the same in their playmates, so tidy up or wax/shave/laser it all off.
Smell divine!
There have been studies done proving that smell impacts how attracted we are to others. Think of the last time you walked passed someone who had the most amazing perfume/cologne on that just made you want to spin them around, grab them and kiss them passionately or pin them against a wall… you know the ones… Now let that be you.
Have a “go with the flow!” attitude!
Let go of expectations of what should happen or be accomplished during the evening. You and your partner have each other so anything (or anyone) else you get to try/experience/enjoy is just bonus stuff! Sometimes the “balance” isn’t “fair” in that one partner may get more action than the other but keep in mind, being a voyeur is being part of the action and often on another night, the other partner is the one in the middle of it all instead. So put away your checks and balances, you’re there to have fun and to see how wild you can get with each other, with others or while watching it all play out!
Know your boundaries and agreements!
And part two is to stick to them! Nothing acts like a buzz kill more than when one person gets caught not sticking to their agreements and then it’s all drama, drama, drama which kills the mood for EVERYONE! Sticking with them builds trust and with trust comes more freedom, which you want, right?
Connect with your partner regularly
You want your partner to feel like your number one because if they feel good and safe (i.e. that you aren’t going to run off with someone else you have your eye and hands on), see the comment about trust above. More security, more freedom, and hell of a lot more fun!
Be selective!
Either pick events/clubs with a specific demographic or large attendance so that you are more likely to get that zing between your legs, OR if you are hosting your own, only invite people to your party that you could quite happily play with all… night… long…
Remember that the women are the ones who generally have the bulk of the power!
It’s pretty universal and it doesn’t mean that the men are just used for their equipment (although most wouldn’t mind if they were), it just tends to be the women who control the pace of the evening and who gets to do what. Help the women feel comfortable and things can get pretty wild, pretty quick.
Get involved!
Don’t just stand around staring and hoping that someone (or some couple) will come and pick you up. The ones that get the invites and action are the ones who are actively socialising, meeting, mingling and engaging with other people. Be the social butterflies, actively get to know people so they can get to know you, which will (ideally) lead to them spending numerous hours getting to know every inch of you.
Be adventurous!
Dare to let go and try new things, things you’ve perhaps never thought about or were too shy to try! This is the place where you can let loose and almost be someone else for a night. If you don’t usually make noise, pretend you’re a porn star (although try not to sound so fake that the whole club knows you’re putting it on – seen that before, it’s not cool), or try positions you’ve never done with someone before. Well, any position with more than two of you is likely to be new at this point!
The swinging lifestyle is a whole new playground for you both, with new people and toys (human or plastic) and a whole lot more stimulation for that imagination of yours. I promise, your sex life will never be the same and nor will you want it to be!
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