Playmate Protocols: Being So Good You Get Invited Back!
Chantelle Austin
on 8 August 2013
28 comments
These are my top ten tips for being the best swinging playmate guest you can be:
- Always check in with the host as to what to wear if they haven’t already told you. That way you are all wearing something similar whether it’s something sexy or casual. You might even have to wear cocktail attire although you may want to confirm their definition of that ;)
- Bring everything you want or need for play such as your favourite toys, condoms and lube. They may not have your preferred brand or have enough for you, so assume they don’t. It’s best to bring your own anyway. I always take my little leopard print bag with condoms, my favourite lube and my magic bullet to make sure I have orgasmic fun.
- Cleanliness is important, make sure you have a shower as close to your arrival time as possible. Brush your teeth and use mouthwash to guarantee you have fresh breath. Smelling good and being clean are big factors in keeping you on the “call back” list. Poor hygiene and bad smells are deal breakers for most people, regardless of how talented your tongue is.
- Arrive on time or within 5 minutes either way of the agreed time. If you are going to be late, call before the arrival time and let them know what time you will be there but do whatever you can to be on time as they may have dinner set for just after your arrival.
- Don’t arrive empty handed even if they have said you don’t need to bring anything. Bring whatever you want to drink and bring enough of it for the whole night so you aren’t dipping into their alcohol stores. If they offer however, you are more than welcome to accept but it’s not polite to ask just because you ran out.
- Take something to eat especially if you are allergic to certain foods. It’s best to take your own snacks so that they don’t have to go out of their way to buy extra things you can eat. They may not even think to ask but if you have a serious allergy that causes anaphylaxis, absolutely let your host/ess know so they don’t cook something that could kill you. Even offer to bring something that you know is safe for you to eat for dinner or suggest a recipe or a small list of dinner options that they can choose from.
- It’s their house so treat it with respect; always use coasters if they do, don’t put your feet on the couch with shoes on or on the coffee table, put your dishes in the sink or dishwasher unless they insist that you don’t, leave the toilet and bathroom as you found it (seat up or down and sink area clean and dry if you’ve splashed water everywhere). It’s surprising how many people don’t do these simple things, hence why they fall off the “favourite playmate” list.
- Follow their lead for where to eat and where to sit etc, and if you aren’t sure what’s ok and what’s not, ask. Also allow them to lead the evening into play, it’s not good form to push to get naked before the hosts are ready and it’s extra polite to ask if it’s ok to do xyz to their partner, or to them, before you do anything. An exceptional playmate will also take the time to find out where the hot buttons are for their hosts so they can make it a night to remember!
- Where possible, don’t play and run the moment the orgasms are done for you… Well, unless they kick you out but that hardly ever happens. Stay and make sure they have had enough pleasure; a good playmate makes sure everyone is also all orgasmed out. Oh and a good playmate guest sends a text message or email the next day to thank them and let them know how much fun they had. There is nothing like a grateful guest but don’t go overboard, flowers and chocolates are not necessary… Although I would never say no to some chocolates.
- Wait to be invited to stay and if the invite isn’t forthcoming, assume you are driving home but if your hosts offer a coffee/tea or something, it’s good manners to accept but don’t stay too long. If they are yawning lots then it’s a sign they are tired and it’s time to go even if they haven’t suggested it. Likewise if you are too, then best to leave so that you can drive home safely.
It’s not really that hard to be a great playmate guest; have manners, respect, be grateful, giving and attentive and you will stand out above many. If you can be easy going, funny, social and talented in the bedroom then you’ll go to the top of the list! Oh and they’ll brag about how good you are to their other swinger friends so you’ll easily get more quality playmates along the way.
Copyright © 2025 Chantelle Austin
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